Disclaimer: I’m writing this as 2:30am as I realised yesterday was Thursday and woke up in a fright at missing my schedule. As a result, this may turn out to be a messy ramble that might not be representative of how I normally feel. Enjoy.

2020 has been a chaotic year. It’s brought on wonderful highs that have made my heart soar, and terrible lows that nearly drove me to take my own life. But wild experiences are often catalysts for growth, and this year was no different. Upon reflection, 2020 has been a breeding ground for insights, but here I’m just going to discuss the one that has been my biggest relevation.   

The idea is: being okay with stuff not being okay.

This year, I discovered that people can really suck. We human beings can be entirely contradictory, tell blatant lies and commit acts of shameful morals. We put on a persona and disguise acts of complete selfishness as acts of charity, deceiving others and ourselves in the process. And when we see others commit the same transgression as ourselves, we reel in horror and disgust. While it seems like I’m accusing others for this, I’m really only speaking for myself.  

But this is my favourite lesson of 2020: that things might suck, and this is okay.

As W. Somerset Maugham described this in his novel Of Human Bondage,

Then he saw that the normal was the rarest thing in the world. Everyone had some defect, of body or of mind: he thought of all the people he had known (the whole world was like a-sick-house, and there was no rhyme or reason in it), he saw a long procession, deformed in body and warped in mind, some with illness of the flesh, weak hearts or weak lungs, and some with illness of the spirit, languor of will, or a craving for liquor. At this moment he could feel a holy compassion for them all. They were the helpless instruments of blind chance.

Sure, people can suck. But why would we expect anything more? I doubt our ancestors were much holier than us. And history has revealed time and time again that humans are capable of pretty horrendous things.

Rather, if we reframe our worldview to see people as being naturally defected, we start seeing the good in others. We look past their failures and rejoice when we see a glimpse of scintillating morality.

Importantly, this radical acceptance of the state of things can be applied to other domains. 2020 had multiple global issues that touched upon cultural inequalities (BLM), a health crisis (Covid-19) and environmental illnesses (bushfires). While one could respond in offense and betrayal at the suffering in the world, it could be more productive just to accept it and act from there.

This is not to say that one should fly low in the face of mediocrity and injustice. Jesus loved the wretched but still tore down temples in the name of a higher goal. The danger I speak of is getting too attached to things being unfair. But instead, if we accept things for the state in which they are in, and avoid being overly idealistic, perhaps life can be lived in a happier and reasonable state.